as the shock wears off

Man, i sure was upbeat and hopeful in that last post, huh?

Well that mood has certainly passed.

The shock of the whole situation started wearing off around Friday afternoon and i moved from denial into some of the other more interesting stages of grief, giving us this week's quote from the first Lemony Snicket book:

They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

There's no need to be maudlin, but having everything you've worked to achieve for almost 20 years taken away from you stings a bit. I'm like a bi-, tri-, quad-, quint-, sept-polar personality experiencing despair, rage, hope, hatred, excitement and confusion in one afternoon. My brain trying to keep everything under control seems to be settling for apathy.
Between each bout of extreme emotion i kinda don't give a damn.
It is too exhausting to be upset. So for most of the weekend i was just meh.
No reason to leave the house.
No reason to shower.
 No reason to put on clean clothes. 
meh
At 1:30 in the morning on Saturday a text arrived from Douglas that simply said Vegas?
You know what? Screw everything; I'm going to Vegas.

Sparkle ponies to return to this space if i can win enough money at the slots to feed them.

fickle finger of Fate

This is the post where i am supposed to be announcing my new job.

Yep, i was leaving outreach.

That's probably an 8.5 on the Shock-O-Meter so i'll give you a moment to come to terms with a world where Niki does not go into schools and blow things up for children.
Here's a picture of a thoughtful llama to assist you.

My museum is undergoing a radical change in philosophy and program delivery that is exciting and cool.
For the last two months my boss, Pete, and I have been working on taking me out of outreach and putting me into the museum in some sort of program managery-type of job. He wanted my skills and i wanted a change. Don't get me wrong, i love outreach; i just felt like there was no challenge in it any more. So i've been pulling away slowly, giving my staff more and more responsibility in anticipation of me not being in charge anymore.
Pete and I met last week to hammer out some final details about the change so i posted that an announcement was forthcoming here in the Nikiverse.
About five hours later, Pete told me that the PTB killed the deal and were dismissing me from the museum.

Yep, i'm fired.

Here's a picture of a baby pig for you.



originally found at gruntleme.com

 I prayed for change.
Mayhaps i should have been a wee bit more specific.

I will not pretend that my heart isn't broken.
I love that museum and i believe completely in its mission.
I feel banished from my home.

However, my spirit is NOT broken.
This is an opportunity.
I wanted change and i got it in spades.
I can go anywhere.
I can do anything.
I can be anything i want.

My quote still stands.
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
Life is forcing me to go elsewhere, to rethink how i identify myself.

I have no clue what is next, but i choose to be hopeful instead of broken.
No one can take that from me.

fair warning

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

Change is on the horizon.

Stay tuned.

Grilled sweet potatoes

Continuing to try new things I wanted to find a different way to cook sweet potatoes.
I'm not sure what put the bug in my brain, but i really wanted to grill them.
Of course, i don't own a grill.
Wait... i do have a George Forman grill, mayhaps that would work.
I halved and thick-sliced my sweet tater and microwaved it for about four minutes to jump start the cooking.
Onto the heated grill they went with cooking spray, kosher salt and cracked paper. They seemed tender after four minutes; that is one thing i do love about my George Forman - the cook time is so short.
To serve my grilled sweet potatoes i mixed up some Jump Up and Kiss Me Passion Fruit hot sauce with softened cream cheese.

DELISH! Give it a try.

aperitif

While i continue to edit and cull the photographic herd from vacation, here is a quick video to whet your appetite.

Home again, Home again, jiggedy-jig

sigh... vacation is over...
I had a wonderful time and brought back a few pictures of the glaciery goodness. Be patient and mayhaps you will see them before 2014.
Guess what i did on the plane home?
Read Sidhartha.
Really.
After a dozen years carrying it around.
After its continual mocking from the To Be Read pile.
Finally, i read it and in fact, quite enjoyed it.
sigh... i love vacation...