Monday, June 25, 2012

as the shock wears off

Man, i sure was upbeat and hopeful in that last post, huh?

Well that mood has certainly passed.

The shock of the whole situation started wearing off around Friday afternoon and i moved from denial into some of the other more interesting stages of grief, giving us this week's quote from the first Lemony Snicket book:
They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.
There's no need to be maudlin, but having everything you've worked to achieve for almost 20 years taken away from you stings a bit. I'm like a bi-, tri-, quad-, quint-, sept-polar personality experiencing despair, rage, hope, hatred, excitement and confusion in one afternoon. My brain trying to keep everything under control seems to be settling for apathy.
Between each bout of extreme emotion i kinda don't give a damn.
It is too exhausting to be upset. So for most of the weekend i was just meh.
No reason to leave the house.
No reason to shower.
 No reason to put on clean clothes. 
meh
At 1:30 in the morning on Saturday a text arrived from Douglas that simply said Vegas?
You know what? Screw everything; I'm going to Vegas.

Sparkle ponies to return to this space if i can win enough money at the slots to feed them.

2 comments:

Rea said...

Go Sparkle Ponies! Still praying and hoping!! Love you!

Rea said...

BTW, after I read your posts to my Man, he said that no one has filled Erma Bombeck's shoes yet, he thinks that's what you are meant to do because you write so well and so witty....and I think she wore a size 6.5 shoe too!