Wednesday, June 4, 2014

a hundred pounds of glitter

My boss Andrew walks into the store yesterday carrying a stack of floral wreaths.
We don't sell wreaths. This can not be good.
Remember my friend, James? he starts.
Oh no, oh no, oh no... James owns a design and decorating business and sometimes gives us his cast-offs to sell or use in the store.
You mean James of the horrible candle holders that i can't get rid of and are still taking up all the space in the back? says I.
Yes. Well long story short, he is leaving the country. I don't know why he's leaving, but i just bought about half of his showroom.
Did i mention that Andrew is not supposed to be buying anything right now as we rearrange the store?
Wait...  he interjects as my eyes roll almost into the back of my head. You can't be mad. Wait till you hear the screaming deal i got AND i bought you a present.
After some more discussion it was revealed that he did indeed get a really, really, really good deal and i was ready to hear about my pres-nent.
They are taking it apart and packing it now. I will go get it later.
What is it???? Give me a hint Andrew
What is you're favorite thing in the world? he asks.
Well, that could be a lot of things because i really like a lot of things.
Shiny, was the next hint.
That doesn't really narrow it down for me.
It will make you squeal.
Yep, that doesn't really help either.
GLITTER he triumphantly announced.
Glitter?!?!
He had told me before that James had an entire glitter section that i would love, so when it was for sale yesterday Andrew bought it for me.
Oh My Squeeeeeeeeee!
Later that day he got a call and said, I am going to go pick up some more things from James, including your present. You just might kiss me when you see this.
I kept pricing the wreaths and floral -we are going to sell them at HonFest, June 14-15- and when he returned i rushed from the back with my hands out in the universal gesture for gimme, gimme, gimme.
Where's my glitter?
Outside. Bring your car keys.
My car keys... why?...
I'm not sure how we are going to get it into your car.
?????????????????????????????????????????
Have you ever received a present that was equal parts FAN-DAM-TASTIC and horrifying, my friends?
All of those long floral boxes are full of containers of glitter.


Totally. 
Full. 
Of Glitter.
And sequins.
And spangles.
And seed beads.
And glitter.







After squinching and shoving and pushing to get all four boxes into my car and throwing Squeaky Monkey on top as there was no where else for him, Andrew turned to me and exclaimed Happy Birthday!
I had no reply. Speechless.

There is so much that when i got home i had to have my neighbor Chad help me unload the boxes as i couldn't lift them.
They are on the front porch as i have no clue where i am going to put 100 pounds of glitter.

Now might be a good time to mention that i am having another crafts yard sale on June 21st.
Free glitter with every purchase.
Glitter.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Glitter is my kryptonite. Morally opposed to it because it never goes away. But whose shocked by that?

Anonymous said...

oh my - that looks like a lot of fun! i have some suggestions:
1. contact your local cheerleaders - they're always making sparkly signs...
2. contact your local strip club..no explanation necessary
3. make your OWN sparkly signs..no need to be stingey with the sparkly when you have such an abundance!
4. girl scouts...always looking for crafty stuff

LOL Sheryl (aka the annoying anonymous commenter heehee)

Anonymous said...

That....is entirely too much glitter - for you, or James, or ANYONE. Do not bring glitter to our lunch date. I'll take my ribbon, but no glitter, not even if it's free with my ribbon.

Kaaren said...

Put it inside your favorite polish. ;)

Anonymous said...

Wanted to stop by. Where are you located. Email at thepeddlersgallery@hotmail.com or call me.
Lorie