Friday, September 5, 2014

cracked humerus head and it isn't funny

sorry... i had to make the joke before anyone else did

Last week i was running in my apartment to answer the phone, fell on my hardwood floor and slid.
No, i didn't trip over something.
No, i didn't have on slippy socks.
I have no idea what happened.
One second i was filled with sleepy glee that i was going to talk to my BFF after a few days away and the next i was on the floor. Rea thinks glitter might somehow be responsible, but i refuse to believe that glitter would betray me like that.
I wish it was a better story, i really do.

The of my upper arm bone cracked right under the knobbily part.

Doesn't look that bad, right?

People, that is 4-6 weeks of having my arm immobilized.
Right at the start of the autumn festival season.
Though when i saw the orthopedic surgeon on Tuesday (yes, it was 6 days before i saw the specialist because of the holiday weekend) he assured me If you have to break your shoulder, this is the way you want to do it because the crack isn't displayed or chipped so i don't need surgery.
This injury doesn't get casted, i just have to hold it still.
For 4-6 weeks.
There is a sling to help, but my recovery hinges on my patience and my body's natural healing process.
Nothing can possibly go wrong with that plan.
Because i am well known for my forbearance, will power and stillness.
And my body never lets me down; it is a well honed machine.

sigh... i'm screwed


Anonymous said...

oooooooowwwwwwwwwwww! poor baby!

Melanie said...

Oh, no! Ouch!! Sending best wishes for patience and quick healing. :)

Kaaren said...

WOW woman! Hope it all goes well.

Anonymous said...

Oh, man, I know this is so NOT funny, but....omfg, only you, Niki, only you. And, hey, at least you know yourself, right? 4-6 weeks of stillness? At the start of autumn? You? You're gonna need bourbon, I think, in order to get yourself to a point of absolute stillness. I'm actively turning my brain away from all the things you cannot do comfortably, if at all, and wishing only that the weeks speed by.