Thursday, July 31, 2008
I couldn't hear for 3 days. Technically i was only deaf in the left ear, but that was bad enough. Everything was muted from the outside, but crazy loud on the inside. I couldn't have on the radio in the car. When i ate it sounded like i was chewing glass. Work was a nightmare : i had no way to judge my volume on stage and i couldn't hear my volunteers when they'd talk to me (volunteers stand on my left on stage). It was awful. I knew, intellectually, that my hearing was gone because of the infection and that it would come back. eventually. But there was a tiny part of me that was still afraid. What if it never came back? What if the antibiotics and decongestants and steroids (i've had more prescriptions in the last 10 days than in the previous 5 years) didn't work? Or what if they worked, but there was irreversible damage? Or if the pressure got so bad that my eardrum ruptured?!? I am not someone who took my hearing for granted; in fact, i always said that unlike most people, i would choose being blind over being deaf. I love sound : crickets outside of my window, the fan over my head, the tap of the keys as i type and of course, music. Living the last 3 days without music has been more difficult than being sick. What if i had to go the rest of my life only hearing half of what was there? Last night my hearing popped back on - it hurt like you wouldn't believe but it is wonderful. It's still not at 100%, but i now know that it is going to be okay. Don't take your hearing for granted, people. And go listen to some GREAT music.