It's Alive!!!!!!!!

Sanity-impaired biologist tableau brought to you by Yakko Warner (no brother or sister to be found)

Origami Madness

Somehow Kate C (nee H) has become the freshman advisor at her school and the freshman class' theme is Japan. How and why would I know this? I received a slightly garbled message on my voicemail late last week instructing me to make as much origami as possible and place it in a bag today. Cryptic. Stacey investigated and found out that Mrs C. (as her kids call her) is planning on decorating the entire Freshman Hallway with hanging origami. (current team member Felicia is a Howard alum and commented "that sounds good. The Freshman Hallway always sucks") I am not one to shirk from a challenge and owe Kate big for favors she has done in the past. On Sunday i checked four origami books (Origami for the First Time, Easy Origami Animals, Step-By-Step Origami and Origami Birds) and an origami DVD (DaVinci Kids presents Origami with Leonore) from the library. I read all the books. I suffered through the DVD (someone should tell Leonore that if a DVD is for kids it should not suck or at least it should be interesting). I meticulously cut paper into various size squares. I tried and tried, only to find out what i already knew: I SUCK AT ORIGAMI. I don't know why. I LOVE paper and really rock at other paper crafts, but origami just escapes me. It must have something to do with my spatial relation skills, but i don't get it. I managed a butterfly (ended up using scissors and some glue), a hamster (not sure what's going on with his tail) and a big duck (who looks good, but can't sit up on his own; he isn't attacking the hamster, just propping himself up). I found one fish pattern that i could do because it uses the same folds as a squash book, which i have taught before in my journalling classes. This week was crazy busy, but i did manage a small school of 17 fish. Late last night i was working on a pig that ended up being so disturbing (if Satan had a pet pig i now know exactly what it would look like) that i ripped it into tiny pieces (no coming alive in the middle of the night, thank you) and gave up on the origami challenge. I delivered my paltry 20 creatures to the high school and can only hope they pass muster. Kate has promised pictures of the project when it is done. I hope her other friends and colleagues have better paper folding skills than me!

TV spot

So how did the TV spot go yesterday, you are wondering. Well, i will say that i definitely prefer performing to an audience instead of a camera. My ear bug had a short so every time i moved my head i lost the studio link so i couldn't hear what the anchors were saying. I had to be here at 6:15am. I felt like a stuttering idiot. I forgot to have Felicia take pictures of the event. Basically it felt terrible. But, the experiment went well and apparently the morning show people talked about it for the rest of the show. I guess that means it went well. The "after" picture of Oscar kinda says it all.

Cupcakes for Everybody!

Today we are celebrating Cupcake Day at work. Technically it is National Bologna Day, but the senior staff thought that would be harder to celebrate. They set up a classroom with a bunch of cupcakes, frosting and toppings and everybody just went to town. Since i was on the road, Annie and Wendy made me a cupcake and left it on my desk. Happy (almost) National Cupcake Day!

!!! PUNKINS !!!

I freaking LOVE pumpkins. Love them. The only thing better than carving your own pumpkin is carving multiple ones for work! On Wed Oct 24th I will be on Fox 45's morning show at 7:10am to talk about "Halloween Around the Harbor" and to do a fun experiment which needs a Jack-O-Lantern. I had to run some tests to figure out the correct size needed so i bought 1 fake and 2 real pumpkins and got to carving. Here are the real ones whole, drawn and carved. I decided to go with one scary and one cheerful: The fake one worked the best in the tests so i think he is the the one i am going to use on tv. His name is Oscar. Guess this means i have to find a home for the other 2. How about my porch?!?

mmmmmm... chili

I am a big fan of swapping crap: i need to get rid of stuff and love to get new stuff. I had an extra iron that was going to live with Rachel. She, in turn, had some HUGE paperclips and retractable purple Sharpies to give me. When i arrived at her house last night she had made dinner in celebration of National Chili Week. She wanted to try a recipe that had cocoa in it and decided to go with a Cincinnati style dish. We did traditional 4-ways with spaghetti, chili, shredded cheese and onions. It was delicious and really different. I was naturally wearing white and got some chili on me in the first bite! Have some chili this week and celebrate! (try not to wear it)

Using found time

I like to be busy, but i can also appreciate quiet times. One of my favorite things is "found time" - unexpected patches of time that you can do with whatever you want because there is nothing scheduled. I was supposed to go to the Ren Fair today, but didn't (who gets stood up for the Ren Fair, for goodness' sakes? i would almost be upset, except that it turned out to be such a lovely day anyways) so i had a whole day of found time. With nothing scheduled i felt no pressure to get anything accomplished; somehow that meant that i ended up getting a lot done. I cooked myself yummy Hot Eggs Florentine for breakfast, did some laundry, washed the week's dishes, scrubbed the kitchen, cleaned, cleared and organized the spice shelf, read 2 Trixie books, showered to get warm (no heat yet; the apartment's 64 degrees which doesn't sound cold, but it is; especially if you have no control over it), walked through town to the Bead Shoppe (which was, of course, closed), went to the bank, stopped by the wallpaper store to pick up 2 free sample books (those puppies are heavy when you are walking home!) and ate lunch in the sunshine on my porch. I decided after the long walk that i was going to skip the gym today and really lazed about in the afternoon. I did some work on the massive list of cards to be made (lots of late October birthdays) and looked through my new sample books for inspiration. I spent a lot of time contemplating how nice it is to rest because you have nothing super-duper pressing to do, as opposed to resting because of sheer exhaustion. Around 4:00 my tummy grumbled. It was too early for dinner and i really wanted something sweet. I thought mayhaps i'd bake something for an afternoon tea. Most of you know that i LOVE to cook, but am less enamoured with baking; i really have to be moved to bake. Plus with the travesty that is my micro-kitchen in the apartment i rarely do either cooking or baking these days. But the mood had struck so into the tiny, but sparkly clean kitchen i went. Quickly i discovered that the fridge contained no milk, butter or eggs. And there was almost no flour, either. Hmmmmmmm... baking without those staples seemed near impossible, but i was not about to let the carefree feeling of the day be ruined by the realities of baking chemistry! Using recipes for cookies, biscuits and pizza crust i was able to cobble together a cinnamon batter-like concoction only to find that none of my baking sheets fit into the wee oven with which my home is equipped. In digging about i stumbled upon a mini-muffin tin that i forgot i owned and has therefore never been used. After 11 minutes the result was tiny muffin-shaped morsels that had a taste and texture like scones. Voila! I present Cinnamini Muffiscones With a mug of Chai and some red grapes, they made a very serviceable tea. Call to announce yourself and i'll be happy to whip up a batch for you!

Giant Pirate Scarecrow

I love, love autumn. It is absolutely my favorite season. The weird heat wave has broken and it is finally glorious fall weather here. Over at Vent My Spleen, Amy has been listing every day a new reason why October is awesome. I thought i'd add my two cents: October is the best because it is the only month when you can use the phrase "giant pirate scarecrows." Outside of nursery in Leesburg, VA I spotted this giant pirate scarecrow who has to be 30 feet tall - check out the tiny team member Amy (different Amy) for size reference:

Emotional Spectrum

My job is a fast paced whirlwind of sights, sounds, and emotions. As we were setting up the first show, I looked over toward the wings of the stage and saw the saddest sight ever - a bunch of balloons totally deflated and hanging from a high beam against a black brick wall After the show we were driving away from the school eating free leftover ham and egg shmuffins (!!!) that the lunch lady had saved for us from breakfast, when Felicia got a case of the giggles so bad that she almost choked on her shmuffin. All of this transpired just as we were passing this road (no lie, really) which made me want to stop fro a photo op (of course) which sent her back into hysterics: Just a few minutes later we were driving through Centerville when we came upon this awesomely spooky house done up for the season (not a scale model, somebody really lives there) It is non-stop every day here in the Nikiverse. (be sure to read the previous post to experience the terror portion of today's spectrum!)

Yet Another Public Service Announcement

Men - there is a point when your wooing of a woman goes from charming to creepy. See if you can spot the moment from this excerpt of a conversation i was having with a custodian at today's school, while trying to wash glassware in the janitor's closet: You are so beautiful; i mean, really gorgeous. It's a good thing there is a law against kidnapping cause i would take you far away and treat you like the queen i know you are. Okay guys, can you tell the instant that made me want to run for my life? Let this be a lesson for you all when macking the ladies.

truth in advertising?

Compare the picture of the glitter lamp on the box (left) and the actual glitter lamp (right). Is this a joke? Is this the manufacturer's idea of truth? Where's the sparkle?Where's the glitter? Where's the convection-current-carried joy? It's like a glowing jar of dead sea monkeys.

word love

I love words - LOVE THEM! I love reading words, writing words, crafting with words. I am in awe of the ability to take an insubstantial thought and fix it to paper with 2-dimensional scratchings of a pen. I love when a turn of phrase captures something or just strikes me the right way. I'm waiting for traffic to die down a bit before i go home to eat Chinese food with my brother as he quickly passes through and am passing the time reading some blogs. Over at hula seventy i read the greatest descriptive phrase that i simply had to share: "...and cuter than cute, cuter than a hundred fluffy bunnies wearing kicky little berets..." BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... can't you just see a bunch of rabbits in hats? it's funny. and cute. and alliteration. bunnys... berets... cute... am i alone in this? hello? maybe i need to go home.

Budding Artist

You might recall that i am rereading my old Trixie Belden mystery series books. Inside of "The Marshland Mystery" i found a piece of paper, about 4X6 that i left in there in 1981. It is an artistic masterpiece of baffling proportions : i do not remember doing it AT ALL. Often i will find old projects that have some element that surprises me; sometimes i will find old poetry or bits of stories that i don't recognize until i've read them a few times and the memory of them is jarred loose. Done in contemporary magic marker this piece reflects my 9 year-old self's sense of color (apparently) and design (yikes). And with the Peter Pan referenced name (printed on the back), it is nice to see that my knack for being familiar, but completely obtuse at the same time was already well developed. For your Monday enjoyment here is my rediscovered artwork. Wow.

Blast from the Past

Francie is visiting from Belgium and last night was my allotted time. It was great to see her and her mom, Nancy. After dinner we decided to play a game and upon careful perusal of the game cupboard we pulled down Pictionary. When this game came out in the mid-late-80s i was a fiend for it. (you'll notice mine is a well loved first edition) When i moved it came with me for sentimental reasons (there was a time when my high school friend Brian D and i were such a scary psychic team that he could draw two lines and i'd know it was "Abraham Lincoln"), but I probably haven't played it in 15 years. In fact, it has been so long that i didn't recognize the board and had no idea what the letters on it signified. I had also forgotten how much FUN this silly game can be. There were some drawings that were amazingly detailed, such as Francie's rendering of the Marx Brothers or ones that became clear with two clues, like "Pluto" (i didn't get it on the dog, but had it immediately when she started the planets) There were drawings that i can't believe anyone was actually able to guess, like my shabby "beatnik" and ones that i can't believe anyone missed, like Miss Nancy's "pharaoh" Then there were the impossible ones. Miss Nancy did this lovely picture of a couple dancing near a city, but Francie and I just couldn't come up with "Madrid." And i got saddled with "conveyor belt" and penned what i thought was an obvious picture of Lucy and Ethel stuffing candy into their mouths and big chef's hats as the candy kept coming faster and faster, but it was apparently not quite as obvious as I thought. The Action category was especially tricky. Miss Nancy had to draw "convert." Really? Convert? In 2 dimensions? In less than 1 minute? I applaud her devil going to angel, followed by the nun praying, followed by the tiny person about to be baptized by full immersion. Needless to say, time ran out before we could guess "convert." Also in action was the next VERY ALARMING picture, made all the more alarming by the fact that some one's MOM was drawing it. Francie correctly guessed "paddle" though i might be scarred for life This weekend you should dig through your own game cupboard and pull out some beloved game from your past; there's a reason it used to be your favorite. Anybody wanna come over to play Risk?

St Mary's County

Have you been wondering where I have been? The answer is: in southern Maryland for work. The site of the founding of the Maryland colony (when the Ark and the Dove landed there in 16??), Saint Mary's county is a bit of an odd duck county. Located at the very bottom of Maryland's middle peninsula it is both agricultural and water-based; imagine farms and micro-towns surrounded by fishing . We always see beautiful vistas, but there are also strange objects on the side of the road (like an orange recliner in the middle of a field behind someone's garage). Tuesday was gloriously beautiful with sunshine so bright everything seemed to glow and puffy clouds in a sky so blue it makes you wonder if you have ever seen the color "blue" before that moment: We had a long lunch so Felicia and I set off to explore Hurry Rd where there such sights as an autumnal tableau using an old color-coordinating truck a telephone booth with a wicked vintage sign a field of goats and the best-named road EVER Near the end of Hurry Rd we found a picture-postcard perfect brick church Built in 1736 the Christ Church King & Queen Parish, with its white-capped steeple and old cemetery is so ludicrously lovely that it looks like a movie set. Felicia spotted a random chair-on-a-grave while i was captivated by the moss covered angel and had to wonder what the "B" stands for in Hezekiah B. Cawdod stood for. After our second show we changed clothes and drove to Point Lookout, where the Potomac River joins the Chesapeake Bay. The not particularly impressive lighthouse (really a house with a light on it, people) has been there in one form or another since 1830. Edging the bay are amazing marsh grasses that grow taller than people (yes, even people taller than Felicia, who is certainly taller then me) that harbor friendly fauna and perhaps the most hilarious sign ever After the battle of Gettysburg, the Union established a POW camp and depot here. There is a museum about it (that was of course closed) and there is a cemetery and memorial for the 3,384 Confederate soldiers that died there. Yesterday as we were leaving the county i saw a bench in front of a side door of our final school that typifies the entire St. Mary's experience Come visit southern Maryland, won't you?