Friday, February 5, 2010
Last week i was having a conversation with fTM Matt about the nature of love when he posited the best definition of love i have ever heard. He said that he thinks love is actually mostly about "being there." I thought about that over the weekend as i drove to Kate P's baby shower. As the roads got worse and the sky got darker, I considered whether this was the best idea i ever had. Briefly, i considered turning back. I wondered if perhaps it had been cancelled and no one called me. I mean who would go out in this? Apparently, the answer is "the people who love you." Sure, i could barely see but i went super slow and was extra cautious cause it was important to be there for this. Driving home was even more interesting (let's put it this way: even i wasn't willing to take either hand off of the wheel to take a picture of the fleet of salt trucks in front of me on the highway) and i found myself thinking of Matt's words over and over. It is easy to show love manifest to the people geographically close to me; i can be there whenever they need me. But many of the people who really matter in my life are far away from me. I try to be a good correspondent, but too often i allow life to get in my way. In emergency or trial i can go to them, offer words, prayers, support, but what about on the normal days? What about today? Sometimes i'm afraid that my friends and family far away don't really know how much i love them because it is hard to be fully present in their lives. I really, really hope that you all know how much i love you, even if i can't drive through a snow storm for you. So i am resolved to do a better job showing my love- being there electronically, postally, vocally or however i can be to those not in this zip code. Are you doing everything you can to really be there for the people in your life?